11/30/23

Good morning happy whatever day it is. Thursday? I was going to work today but I kind of feel crappy. I woke up while Scott was getting ready for work. I temporarily forgot how much he talks to himself. He makes coffee and takes the dogs out though so I might keep him. I fell back asleep after he left into a super deep sleep and woke up around 8:30. Guess I'll take another day off of work. 

Yesterday Scott went to the funeral home with his brother. He had me drop him off at his moms since he had 3 vehicles there at one point and needs to bring them home. He brought the truck home later. Down to motorcycle. Wonder where that's going to go. 

Anyhow, he wanted me to come in and show him which blue dress it was his mom wanted. She had told use that she wanted to be buried in this blue dress for years. I went in and pulled it out for him. Then I was like I'm taking this plant home ok? My goal when I first started going over there 2 years ago was to not kill this plant lol. Some how it is still alive. One time when I went over there the whole thing was laying flat. It has like 6 plants in it and desperately needs to be repotted. I actually bought this plant like 20 years ago so I'm just taking it back. But it's little side kick buddy had to come too. 

After that I dropped him off I went to Joann's and bought some batting, interfacing and white thread. I made it out with just that. Amazing!

Scott came home later and they decided on a viewing on Friday 12/8 (Scott's dad's birthday) from 2-4 and then graveside services on Saturday 12/9 at 10am.  I had my one and only craft show scheduled for the 9th so that is out the window. 

I was cleaning my sewing desk area up looking for a keychain I had set aside for my friend but heck if I can find it. I think Tina must have taken it hostage. 

Since I don't have any more craft shows lined up I decided I should work on a quilt for the new baby. 

I decided to just do a string quilt since I love making them and they are relaxing. I'm doing blue, yellow/orange, and green.

I pulled out my scrap rolls I've made and have been picking out the colors I want out of them to start. I think I will have to cut some green strips but that's ok. Use it up!

 I started by making 10 blocks of blue and yellow at 9:45pm last night lol. Now I'm going to make some blue and green ones. 

I made stew for dinner this picture is horrible. The stew was good though. I'm going to have to go to the store today there is almost nothing left in the fridge. 

11/29/23

Good morning! 

It's a new day for my mother in law in heaven with no pain since she passed away yesterday around 6pm. Scott was there and had made himself something to eat. He went into his bedroom and when he came out a little bit later to wash his dishes she was gone. I'm glad he was able to be with her on her last day. He just left to go over to the house and work on cleaning his room up that he has lived in for almost two years. He doesn't know what to do with himself. Later today he's supposed to go with his brother to the funeral home and get that stuff started. He was talking about going to work for a bit too since that is how he escapes. I took the day off. I'm going to distance myself from the house as much as possible because this is the time where his siblings who are the type to steal things will act like I am also that way. 

The kids came over yesterday so Jess could go to her doctor's appointment. She got there and they said we tried to call you to cancel. I guess the person doing sonograms went home sick. So all that arranging and no Dr.'s appt. She was sad she didn't get to see the baby but was glad if the girl was sick she wasn't breathing on her.

Simon has decided she's not a big fan of the kids now lol. She was all snuggling with Trevor to stay away from them. 

It was weird last night. Scott packed up some of his stuff to bring home, turning off the lights etc. Now for the next part. I should probably take my stuff off his closet rod now too ;)

11/28/23

Good morning happy Tuesday. I'm feeling a little guilty about how glad I  am that I'm not at my mother in laws today. Yesterday work was dead so I was just sitting around turning to mush. Hospice and my brother in law never showed up either. I had to change her myself and it just kills my back. Aunt Flo showed up today too so I'm sure that isn't helping.

Yesterday I left Simon out in the house with Trevor's door open since he was sleeping. I guess he slept all day and she got bored so she re-ate the couch. Trevor gets to work on his patching skills again. You can see part of the last patch lol. The previous time I was able to sew the fabric back together but she's been rather ambitious. Darn animals. It doesn't really matter at this point since the cats have also scratched it to hell. 

I've already been outside with her 3 times to throw the ball and I just got my coffee. It finally is getting colder in the mornings and she's like this is my weather!

Scott took off work to watch his mom today since I am going to watch the littles while Jess goes to her specialist dr appt. Hopefully work stays dead while they are here. I actually got one email of something to do finally but it will only take a minute. 

I also have darts tonight so a busy day!

11/27/23

Good morning happy (or not) Monday from my mother in laws. Scott is off to work and I'm waiting for a work email of work to do. I had ZERO emails for work on Friday. We'll see how long it takes to get people going today.

Yesterday I puttered around all morning and then did some cleaning. The kids came over around 2:30 and stayed til 5 when their dad came and picked them up. Rosie with her Miss Rachel. She got overstimulated eventually and I took it away. She also played for awhile before she got to watch it so she wasn't looking at it the whole time lol. Daniel was running around playing. He is into throwing things, sometimes at your head when you aren't looking. I got a dinosaur to mine at one point. Dang kids!

Snookie catching some rays

I was sitting in the recliner and she fit just perfect next to me. She's such the lap dog.

Tina napping on the pile of abandoned laundry. Probably will have to rewash all that stuff since they have been laying on it. 

After the kids left I went and got Chinese food and brought it to have dinner with Scott. Poor guy is probably super glad to go to work today so he can get out of this house. He only left to take care of Trevor's truck since Thursday night. That's a long time.  His mom responded to me again and I swear she tried to say I love you back to me a couple times. This morning when I came in she woke up for me too. When she hears my voice she makes a little sound. Breaking my heart a little more each time. I'm too much of an empath for this job. I could definitely never be a nurse. 

Anyhow (cry cry) I stayed til a bit after 8 then went home and went to bed. I was awake forever. How can you be so tired and not fall asleep? Then I was awake at like 2 for an hour or so. So doing good this morning. I locked all the doors and put the top lock on too here so it takes Mr Asshole longer to get in. Just to be a dick and I have more notice of him coming in. Thinking about recording on my phone while he is here just in case he decides to verbally assault me again. Since he only does it when no one else is around. Not that Scott doesn't believe me. 

Tomorrow Scott will have to watch his mom so I can help with watching the kids while Jessica goes to her specialist appointment. I'm supposed to have darts tomorrow too so that will  work out. He really should be here anyways. 

Jess and I were talking about the full moon last night and I was looking up if more people pass on a full moon. I found this and thought it was nice. 

The full moon is often associated with a good death when a person lives life in fullness and dies in old age — part of a cultural belief system that can offer condolences for the grieving family. The roundness and brightness of a full moon is the reflection of the human condition and desire, longing for perfection, fullness, goodness, timelessness, happiness, hope, and love.

 Today is day 5 of no water and day 4 of no food. How long can a body last?

11/26/23

Hello happy Sunday! I didn't have any pictures so here is Tina begging for loves. 

Yesterday Scott and Trevor went and got us some pizza from Papa Murphy's (you bake it at home) so we had that for a late lunch. Trevor had left and Scott I thought went to take a shower and I was laying on the couch because I was exhausted. Scott's brother comes in and looked at me through the screen thing in the doorway and then went into the kitchen/living room where his mom is. After a few minutes I heard a bang of sorts and I was like wonder what that was. I was sitting up and he comes into the doorway and yells at me something about the trash being full. I was like we couldn't take it out because the outside trash was full and they JUST picked it up. (The trash in the kitchen wasn't over flowing either). Then he yells at me about making this house a mess like I live there. I kind of laughed a little and said CALM DOWN WE'RE NOT THE ENEMY and he slams the door and then peels out in his truck and I heard a car honk at him. Sheesh. I think someone needs some therapy. What a crazy ass. I found Scott out in the garage doing laundry and he didn't hear a thing with the washer and dryer going. We went in the kitchen and he had kicked one of the smaller cans over (they have 3 cans for trash so you have to sort out recycling and stuff) and there was 2 pieces of pizza on the cutting board. There was like 4 things in the sink. I guess you're supposed to eat standing up and just put it away immediately.

Anyhow so that was fun and still rolling around in my head today. I decided to go home around 6 and fed the animals and played with the dogs a bit and then I went to the bar where our friend Dave bought me drinks and then I came home and made a turkey sandwich and went to bed. Surprisingly I'm not hung over this morning.

Since it is watch the kids Sunday I think I will stay home this morning. Scott said his mom is the same as yesterday. She's full of little energizer batteries I think. Jess said Daniel will pick them up around 5 so then I can take Scott dinner and hang out then. Hopefully I'll miss the Jack Ass daily visit to show he's boss. 

The hospice people never came yesterday either. So much for coming daily.

 

11/25/23

Hello happy Saturday! Lets start with a few more Thanksgiving pics Jess sent me last night.

Trying to get everyone coordinated for the timed picture haha This is my kids and (part of) Daniel's family

Yesterday Jess, Melissa & Eric all came to hang out with Grandma a bit. Jess wanted to paint her nails so she did one hand and Melissa did the other. It was so sweet.

Grandma was listening and would move her mouth a tiny bit or her eyebrows but that was it. 

I decided to go home around 6:30 since there wasn't much of a change and I didn't want to sleep on the trundle bed again. That thing was like sleeping on plywood. If I spend the night again I'll sleep on the couch.  Melissa left about the same time as me. Jess had left a bit earlier since she has the littles at home. 

I got home and had some furry snuggles and washed up all the Thanksgiving prep dishes. There really wasn't that much but there was a lot of bulky things. 

Tina head butts.

Tubz didn't want anything to do with me after I fed her some dinner haha. Such a guys cat. 

I went to bed not too long after cleaning the kitchen and eating some pie. I woke up to Trevor texting me at like 11:30 that his truck wouldn't start after work. We decided the easiest thing would be for me to just go get him and deal it with it in the morning. So I went to get him at like midnight. I had to stop and get gas on the way too. Simon went along for the ride.

This morning we went to go see if it would start and no deal so I came and switched places with Scott and they went and got a starter and put it in.

When I came in I said good morning to my mother in law and she opened her eyes and made some noises. Well. Didn't expect that. She was doing a bit of moaning so I gave her some meds and gave her lots of wet swabs with the sponge thing for her mouth. Of course she stopped making noise right before Scott got back. 

I asked Scott to humor me and take the mirror off the wall behind her. The energy feels much better now. I'm glad he did it even though he thinks I'm nuts lol. 

Yesterday we were looking for the photo albums from when Scott was little and surprise they are not where they used to be. We can't find them so far. I told him a long time ago he should have brought those home since most of them were pictures while hew as growing up. I guess he believes me now. We did find more loose pictures while we were looking. 

Not sure when this picture was taken but I like it. 

his mom with 3 out of 4 daughters

His mom with the 2 daughters that have passed away in the last 2 years.  His mom was about my age here, just a bit older. Melissa was impressed with their legs. I said they were all lookers!

Haven't heard when the hospice people are coming today yet. Yesterday the girl said she's showing the signs that it won't be long so they will come every day now. 

11/24/23

Hello happy Black Friday. Me and like 3 other people are working today lol I had one email that got sent to me after I got off the computer on Wednesday that I did and now it's crickets. 

Wednesday was pretty horrible here with mother in law. She was in agonizing pain and it was just horrible to hear. I kept giving her meds every 2 hours and eventually she calmed down and seemed to check out.  She was pretty much checked out until Thursday night when I came over after Thanksgiving she actually responded to me and I got her to eat a pudding cup. Then she checked out again. 

I think the girls are coming to see her today. The nurse is coming in a little bit too. They sure don't come as often as I thought they would. You'd think they'd have someone come by every day to check on everything.

So Thanksgiving! I cooked the turkey, sweet potato pie, bacon wrapped little smokies and the stuffing of course. Melissa came over and did the deviled eggs and salami with cream cheese and peppers. I cut the turkey all up and put it in the crock pot and that worked out great. Still have to wash all my cooking dishes that I left lol. I figured they'd be there later. 

A surprise double yolker

Scott's brother had come over to his mom's house and offered to sit with his mom for a bit so Scott could come eat with us so that was very nice. 

Little buddy left his clothes on the whole time it's a miracle haha

Spinning with auntie Melissa

have to get the Jess & Daniel from her, took a picture of them on her phone. We took a couple group pictures too. 

These were huge plates. Did not eat it all lol

Little man was running around and wanted me to go with him in the kitchen. I gave him some marshmallows and he fed me some and him some more haha. 

Dessert buffet lol

My cousin posted this on FB yesterday. So funny since when Scott and I talk a lot of people think we're arguing and I'm like we're just having fun.

Well sounds like a hospice nurse is coming in a bit and then a chaplain lady called and I said might as well come since she's religious in her head even though she never really went to church. 

Moving a long at a slow pace but moving along. Oh and hi Rachael thanks for commenting. She's not going anywhere at this point. I don't suspect she'll be here much longer. 

11/22/23

Good morning from the hospice house! 

This morning I had to stop by our outgoing mail box and noticed all the birds sitting on the internet tower. No wonder it has so many issues lol. You'd think they'd put some streamers on it or something to keep them off. 

When I got here mil was being a bit ranty. We started to change her diaper but then realized the gal didn't put a pad under her yesterday and the whole bed was soaked in pee. So we had to figure out how to change everything on a bed with someone laying in it. At one point Scott just picked her up for a sec so we could get the sheets on/off. My whole body is aching now. I'm not used to doing those things and haven't lifted weights in awhile lol. It's amazing how much a 70 something pound woman feels like she weighs when changing her. I can't imagine a heavy person. She's been mostly quiet now except for every so often she yells about hurting but I went in to give her more meds and she acted like she was sleeping (or was) and wouldn't respond to me. 2 minutes later yelling again. 

Yesterday the girl came to give her a bath and she was SO PISSED! I thought she was going to deck her. I ended up having to help with that while Howard cleaned the front walk way. Because why would you want to help where it is needed.  I mean the walkway looks great but he could have done that after.

When the girl left mil checked out for pretty much the rest of the day. I left to go get some lunch but mostly just to get away for a little bit. Howard was here farting around outside. After work hours were done I did some cleaning and straightening up. It feels so much better. I brought my vacuum yesterday but didn't want to do it while she was quiet. 

Aren't these little guys cute? I thought I broke one because the head fell off but it is supposed to be that way (mustard). Scott said they used to sit on top of the stove fan in the kitchen. 

I also found a bunch more pictures of my kids in their little developed envelopes. Those were fun to look at. Lots of pictures of her plants that have almost all been killed off now since the boys didn't water them :(

We get off work two hours early today. Thank God. Wish I had Friday off too but it should be pretty dead anyways. Most people take it off so not much work going around. My mom is bringing me lunch but she said she's going to Wal mart first so she'll probably be a few hours after lunch time lol.

Scott is off for Thanksgiving and the day after so 4 days I won't have to be here all day. I'll probably have to come and help with changes and stuff though since it's so hard with only one person. Plus it's really lonely here by yourself. She doesn't do any conversations at all just either yelling, babbling or checked out. :(

Tomorrow morning I will be cooking the turkey and doing the sweet potato pie. Oh and the sausage and bacon wraps. I'm going to cook the turkey early and then cut it up and put it in the crock pot so it's done and out of the way. I need to do some laundry too. One more time for my Choco-Cat fall shirt lol. I ordered 3 fun Christmas shirts hopefully they fit.

Oh and hi Gillian! Thanks for stopping by. I always wonder who the 20 or so people are that read and don't comment lol. 

 

11/21/23

Hello happy Tuesday. I've lived like a month in the last 2 days it feels like.  

This morning was rough and I cried a few times already. Probably going to cry again. 

When I got here MIL was agitated and she just kept getting worse. She kept saying open the door so she could leave. I asked her what door I should open and she said all of them lol. After some meds she has changed from the mean Blanche as we call her to the nicer one we are calling Alice. I swear she has multiple personalities. But now I'm watching her hallucinate. She was just holding up her tissue box and I was like do you want me to do something with this? She said I was trying to give food to that girl.  Someone is coming at some point today to give her a sponge bath. I'm sure Mr in charge will show up right before. I'm going to leave and go get a coffee or something when he gets here. I need a break already and it's only 9:30.

Yesterday I decided this coat rack had to move. I scared myself like 4 times walking by it lol.  I put it in the master bedroom no one goes into.

So yesterday my brother in law showed up right before the hospice lady came. She got here and I was trying to go over the meds with her and she kept looking at him and asking if he gave her stuff. I was like he has not been here. Eventually she got it. Then he was telling her how he was going to put a lock box outside so they could let themselves in when no one was here. She was like? I said she can't be left alone right? She says NO! Someone should be here 24/7. He still put up a lock box though. I told him later when we were having a discussion he could actually go to jail for leaving her home alone, that it is elder abuse. He doesn't believe me still. 

When I was going to get my diaper changing lesson he started to walk out the door to the garage and I was like you don't want to stay around for the lesson? He said I got it yesterday JULIE. I was like oh well I didn't know that. Should have been like well I guess I could have called you to come do it. The diaper change took forever and it's really hard with only one person (still haven't tried it myself yet). Scott and I did it last night before I left and he did it himself this morning he said. 

He comes in after the hospice gal left and say I just want to tell you thank you. I was like OMG like I really appreciate that! And then he says I know you don't like me and I don't like you. I was like Uh I never said (to him I'm always pretty cordial to him) and then I was like can I ask you why you don't like me? He said well I always take control. I was like I take control? Like when did I ever take control? He said like right when Suzie died you went looking for her wallet. I was like??? I was helping you find her ID and stuff since you were looking for it! She had just shown us where she kept her bank statements and stuff so I was showing him so he could get the stuff he needed. What a fucking asshole. And then he said and I like got in the middle with Michele for them to fight and I said I don't even know you're fighting. I said the only thing I've ever told Michele about you is answer questions when she asked. He probably didn't like that I told her the truth lol. Anyhow, we seemed to end on a good note but nice to even be able to defend myself for whatever crap they were dreaming up about me. I told him all I've ever done here is be nice to his parents and I'm not here for the money. I have my own money and my stuff is worth more than anything in this house lol. I think he probably thinks I'm like him a money grubber, you know, cuz if you are one you think everyone else thinks like you.

After Scott got home (well his mom's home) we talked for a little bit. I got dinner from the drive through and then went home to my animals. TG for animals even though they drive me nuts 1/2 the time. 

11/20/23

FML guess where I'm at. 

Yesterday Scott went to the football game with his buddy and while he was there he gets a call that his mom is coming home RIGHT NOW. He's like uh well I'm not there. Is brother like got mad that he wasn't there. WTF. When he got back to town he went straight to his mom's and his brother didn't leave any instructions and took off. I was babysitting the kids but got their dad to come pick them up a little early so I could go help out a bit. 

There are all these meds on the table. Howard had said she doesn't need any of these until tomorrow. Uh are you sure about that? I had to Google them all to figure out what they were. We ended up giving her the morphine and I went to Wal Mart to get liquid Tylenol since we didn't thinks he'd swallow the pills. We got about 15 ml in here between Scott squirting it on her head & pillow and her not liking it lol. I guess she finally calmed down after I left at 11. I think I slept for two hours maybe. Wide awake from 3am on. I came back at 6 so he could go to work. Like did Howard think he was just going to take off work or leave her home alone? WTF. If he shows up I'm going to be like oh glad you are here for your shift. Hopefully someone from hospice comes today too. I already gave her some of the morphine because I can't take the owww owww oww she does.  Going to have to attempt some tylenol too if she keeps it up. I don't think she's checking out anytime soon so yeah for us :(

I was trying to unplug this switch adapter thing then replug in the lamp to the other one but whoops. That's not going to happen now. 

Back to cute fun stuff from yesterday.

She was touching Snookie, so cute with her little belly out

BAD DOG

That's better

When I was leaving last night. Ended up going back in and putting PB in a bone for her and putting her in her crate. I was like she's for sure going to eat the couch if I leave her out lol. Trevor was out too so I she was going to be unattended!

Snookie this morning! I think everyone is going to sleep in this thing but a baby lol

Well guess I'll set up my work laptop now. Still coughing too. Ugh. Probably have to take myself to urgent care if it doesn't go away in a day or two.